Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Why Rihanna, Why?

Check out this video about the whole Rihanna/Chris Brown situation. Personally, I am shocked that Rihanna is getting back together with Chris, and that she has asked the judge not to press charges against him. After hearing that he bit her ear and smashed her head against the side of a car, I can't help but ask, "why Rihanna, why?

Oprah has been so disturbed by this whole Rihanna/Chris Brown case that she has decided to do a show about domestic violence on Thursday March 12 - it would probably be worth checking out.

As Oprah says, "Love doesn't hurt. If a man hits you once, he will hit you again."


  1. Most women try to leave their abusers multiple times (I realize that Rihanna is not facing the economic strain that many women face, such as not being economically able to leave their abusers) and I think we should be careful of how we judge her. It's never easy, and she's young. She's 20, and probably not all that experienced with dating. Also, it's easy to look in from the outside and say "she should leave him" (and she probably should) but it's hard to just abandon a relationship you're emotionally invested in, especially if he's really, really nice a lot of the time (and I'm sure he's quite a smooth, sweet talker).

    This is not an uncommon reaction, and educating oneself on domestic abuse is a great idea. However, I hope that people - especially those in the feminist community - remain supportive of Rihanna and other women in her situation (even when they go back to their abuser, as many women do). Because leaving is complicated, and it usually takes a few tries.

    I'd be really surprised if this is the first incidence of abuse between these two.

    I wish her all the best and I wish she would leave him. I also want her to be out of the situation if it's dangerous. I just hope her family and close friends don't abandon her because she needs people who really love her more than ever. he's probably done quite a number on her self-esteem and I hope her family and true friends do everything they can to let her know she is loved by people who aren't abusers.

    Poor Rihanna. What a terrible thing to go through, but I can't even imagine going through it under such close scrutiny (an Oprah special? Brutal.)

  2. I just recently had a conversation with a social worker who specializes in women's counseling and we talked about the high rate at which battered (women) return to their (male)abusers. We also talked about the amount of judgment the abused face from outsiders, often including people in the social work field whom are supposed to be the kind of people that provide unbiased support to victims of abuse.

    Poor Rihanna, indeed.

    Hopefully, Oprah will be sure to address some of these points and enlighten those whom might otherwise be quick to think, "How could (she) be so stupid?" Obviously, Rihanna's convinced that things will get better; although that's frightening and quite surreal to many of us, it's very likely the case.

    I'd like to believe that if someone I know and love suddenly lapses into a violent rage and physically attacks me, I'd have the intuition to flea as fast as possible. But thinking about it realistically, I might want to continue loving that person despite their 'lapse of judgment'. I might also be convinced that it won't happen again.